Resources on God’s Design for Marriage
In the month of April and May, we embarked on a 4-week series titled, “God’s Design for Men and Women”. Pastor Andrew helped us to see the glorious mystery of marriage. A Spirit-filled marriage displays the relationship between Christ and His Church.
What does it look like? What does it mean for how we date? How do we think about singleness? We have compiled some additional resources if you have questions or would like to explore more!
On Marriage
Marriage: 6 Gospel Commitments Every Couple Needs to Make
(Paul David Tripp)
“When two people say “I do,” they begin the journey of a lifetime—and they expect that journey to be perfect. Expectations of the perfect marriage are sure to fade away in the struggles of everyday life, but many are shocked when their marriage morphs into something they didn’t intend it to be. A long-term, gospel-centered marriage needs to be grounded in something sturdier than romance.
… Paul David Tripp encourages couples to make 6 commitments to one another; commitments such as practicing forgiveness, appreciating differences, and actively working toward a relationship that is built on trust. Through each chapter, Tripp encourages readers to be motivated by grace as they strive to make Jesus Christ the center of their marriages.”
Marriage Matters
(Winston Smith)
“This book offers a simple, yet powerful prescription for changing marriages one ordinary moment at a time. Change begins with understanding how and why small disagreements evolve into major problems, taking practical steps to love one another more effectively, and learning how to take those same steps over and over again. Interactions that used to devolve into pointless annoyances and fights can become opportunities for God’s love to become increasingly evident and powerful. Winston takes abstract, biblical principles and applies them to the concrete details of life so that ordinary marriages can become extraordinary.”
Marriage for God
(Christopher Ash)
“It is our natural tendency to seek personal happiness and satisfaction in marriage. We often give our own needs, wants, and goals first priority. But what is God’s design for our marriages? With clarity and conviction, Christopher Ash turns us away from marriage for ourselves and toward marriage in the service of God. With practical applications for everyday life, Ash shows us God’s purposes and patterns for every part of the marriage relationship.
By realigning our hopes, expectations, and goals for marriage according to the Bible, we will discover the deep joy and lasting fulfillment that comes from a God-centered marriage.”
The Meaning of Marriage
(Timothy and Kathy Keller)
“Modern culture would have you believe that everyone has a soul-mate; that romance is the most important part of a successful marriage; that marriage does not mean 'til death do us part, but merely for as long as my needs are being met; and that when serious differences arise, divorce is the best solution.
According to the Bible, all of these modern-day assumptions miss what marriage is all about. In The Meaning of Marriage, Timothy Keller, along with Kathy, his wife of thirty-six years, draws a profound portrait of marriage from the pages of Scripture that neither idealizes nor rejects the institution but points us back to the relationship between God and man. The result is a vision for marriage that is refreshingly frank and unsentimental, yet hopeful and beautiful. This book is for anyone from singles, to couples considering marriage, to those who have been married recently or for a long time.”
On Dating
Catching Foxes: A Gospel-Guided Journey to Marriage
(John Henderson)
““Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that are ruining the vineyards . . .” Song of Solomon 2:15
Why are foxes on the cover of this premarital guide? Because every marriage has “foxes” lurking inside it! We all have idols and selfish appetites—and, like the foxes in Solomon’s vineyard, they can cause untold destruction and heartache. In fact, how seriously a couple takes their own foxes will influence whether their marriage blooms and glorifies God, or is a shallow and pale imitation of the real thing.
In this workbook for both individuals and groups, biblical counselor John Henderson stimulates meaningful conversation and prayer between engaged couples. The book’s interactive format provides couples with a foundation for understanding what marriage is really about, becoming a godly husband or wife, and understanding conflict and resolving it biblically.
Sit down together, ask a married couple to come alongside you, and get ready to chase the foxes out of your relationship.”
This is used by our couples doing pre-marital counselling, and you can borrow it from GBC’s library!
Dating with Discernment
(Sam Andreades)
“Done with dating? Don’t know where to start? Wondering if your date is the one to marry? Pastor-scholar Sam Andreades brings single Christians in that vulnerable life moment the practical, theological help to make the dangerous decision confidently. Bringing the Bible’s wisdom on relationships to bear on the dating scene, he helps you lay a foundation for a love that lasts.”
Pre-Engagement: Five Questions to Ask Yourselves
(David Powlinson and John V. Yenchko)
“How do you know if you’re ready to marry? What are the signs that a man and a woman are heading in the same direction and are right for each other?
In this booklet a biblical counselor and a pastor team up to offer five pertinent questions that will help couples decide whether to commit themselves to each other for life. These questions bring to light basic convictions, assumptions, expectations, priorities, and more. As couples think through and discuss them, they will get to know themselves and each other better – a wise investment toward building a marriage on a solid foundation, with Christ at the center.”
On Singleness
7 Myths about Singleness
(Sam Allberry)
“Much of what we commonly assume about singleness—that it is primarily about the absence of good things like intimacy, family, or meaningful ministry—is either flat-out untrue or, at the very least, shouldn’t be true. To be single, we often think, is to be alone and spiritually hindered.
But the Bible paints a very different picture of singleness: it is a positive gift and blessing from God. This book seeks to help Christians—married and unmarried alike—value singleness as a gift from God so that we can all encourage singles to take hold of the unique opportunities their singleness affords and see their role in the flourishing of the church as a whole.”
Not Yet Married: The Pursuit of Joy in Singleness and Dating
(Marshall Segal)
“Many of you grew up assuming that marriage would meet all of your needs and unlock God’s purposes for you. But God has far more planned for you than your future marriage. Not Yet Married is not about waiting quietly in the corner of the world for God to bring you “the one,” but about inspiring you to live and date for more now.
If you follow Jesus, the search for a spouse is no longer a pursuit of the perfect person, but a pursuit of more of God. He will likely write a love story for you different than the one you would write for yourself, but that’s because he loves you and knows how to write a better story. This book was written to help you find real hope, happiness, and purpose in your not-yet-married life.”